Sippin' on some Kalezurrp.

I've been on my green juice diet for 5 days now and I wanna reflect on my experience. 

The first few days were very kind to me as I felt mellow, energized, and hyped that I'm getting brand new. I woke up and downed a large cup of lemon water to compensate for the Foldgers in my cup and I Zumba'd and did toning exercise afterwards. Then I got ready for grindmode for 8 hours. Surprisingly in 3 days, I had enough energy to exercise and my hunger was unnoticed. However, when shits too good to be true, Hell welcomes you with open arms.

On the 4th and 5th day, I started to miss food. This was triggered by many factors: my nurses daily lunch delivered by a hearty food truck, my Yelp researches for my birthday dinner plans, my Ice Cream Social activity in which I had to serve folks up with sundaes and my Love's natural need to eat a fucking drippy cheesy meaty overstuffed Great Steak sandwich while I had a cold cup of nothing. Luckily, I have wonderful Family & Friends that support my goal by leaving motivational messages as if they were watching me run a marathon. Oh and THANK GOD for Extra Dessert Gum! Root Beer and Mint Chip are my faves.

Six mo' days left of this shit and then I gets to EAT. Luckily it'll be on the day of my Sister's rehearsal for her wedding in Tahoe. Can't wait for her Wedding but more importantly, I can't wait to grub. Just joking fools. Her day is worth Hunger Games. 

Music Therapy: "Sippin on Some Sizzzurp" 3 6 Mafia-"I'm trill working the wheel, a pimp not a simp. Keep the dope fiends higher than the Goodyear Blimp.

We eat so many shrimp, I got iodine poisoning."

Rest in Paradise Pimp C.  

Go Hard or Go Home.

I'm gonna straight up juice starting today until my Sister's wedding (11 days) so take this as a fair warning. Side effects include Captain Bitch, depression, food obsession, zombie mode, hatred for beings that chew food along with friends that post pictures of their food. Imma be the bitch that kills your vibe. 

The longest that I've completed a straight juice fast was 4 days and honestly, I felt a mixture of intense calmness while experiencing an amazing detox that filtered trash from my state of mind. Although these sound positive, I'm madd weary of juicing for over 10 days like an addict feels entering rehab. I'm gonna have to dodge simple pleasures of cold brews, sodium rich carbohydrates, string cheese, and protein errthang. FML. Wish me luck and I'll journalize my experience to help me process my juicing drank in my cup.

Music Therapy: Goapele "Undertow"- "But I'm not ready to go.

About to ride that wave, Got me in your zone. Caught up in that undertow,

Baby you already know,

I know I should leave

But something won't let go." 

The Day My God Died. 07.13.03

How does a decade feel like last night? My heart still aches and I hold back tears from the pain of missing my father. I deal with it in healthier ways nowadays and I am thankful that my binge alcoholic habit has been killed and I'll toast to kale juice instead. I hold memories of my dad's morals, sayings, temperament reactions as I bleed my dads traits and I do the right thing as he'd want me to. That's the only way he's still a part of my life. 10 years ago at his workplace memorial, I was overwhelmed by the caring support from kind strangers. One lady had a moment with me and told me that even though he's not here, I can still be strong and do good for my life and make him proud of that. I took her advice and my spirit ran and ran and continues to run the infinite marathon of life. I'm not sure how different my life as just Amy would have evolved...would I have finished college? Would I still be friends with my enemies? Would my cynicism still exist? Over the years since my dad left, I've built the will to go hard all day. And its my experience with losing my family that drives me to climb. So even though I do wonder the "what if's", it makes sense that the universe has conspired for me to go through some Kite Runner shit and enforce the lessons that transformed me into a person that does not take shit for granted.

Psychology has suggested that girls like guys that share similar attributes to their fathers. I think that some of that is true and that some of the guys I dated were just stretch marks to their mothers' bodies. Luckily I found my love and I know my dad approves. He's my Space Oddity, hero, best friend and lifeline, like my dad. He respects me and values me as his rarity. My dad would have been happy for me. And though I'll always mourn my loss as faded pictures & memories are a constant, I will abide to the promise made for my father on the day he was called home.

My life Started from the bottom and I'm still here.